Six months ago Ryan and I walked into a government office in Nanchang, China. There on the 26th floor we nervously waited to meet our daughter. When I held her for the first time, I've never felt such peace and calm.
We are a match made in Heaven!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Our Happy and Busy life.
The entry is below these pictures. I'm having trouble moving the entry above the pictures. I don't know what I'm doing wrong
This is a family picture taken at Christmas Mass.
I don't know if Ally is smiling or whining here.
Ally smiling for the camera on her 1st birthday, Nov 8, 2010.
Ally taking a ride in her new car that she got from us for her birthday.
Ally with her Mammaw at her 1st Thanksgiving.
Ally waiting patiently for her bath.
Ally walking with her new walking toy.
Ally being animated and entertaining.
Opening up gifts on her first Christmas.
This is a family picture taken at Christmas Mass.
I don't know if Ally is smiling or whining here.
Ally smiling for the camera on her 1st birthday, Nov 8, 2010. Ally taking a ride in her new car that she got from us for her birthday.
Ally with her Mammaw at her 1st Thanksgiving.
Ally waiting patiently for her bath.
Ally walking with her new walking toy. 
Ally being animated and entertaining.
Opening up gifts on her first Christmas.
Ally's Baptism Dec 10, 2010
Wow, a lot has happened since my last post.
The biggest change for me is my returning to work. I love teaching, but I have lost some of my passion for it. I now have a passion for being a mom and spending time with my Ally. I guess this is a normal progression, but it has surprised me. Before Ally, I spent so much time creating lesson plans, grading papers, agonizing over discipline issues etc. Now, I get done what I can by 4:30 and then I pick up Ally from daycare. What doesn't get done at school doesn't get done. Sure, I still grade the occasional paper at home, but it's not like I used to be.
Ally has changed so much!! Here are a few of her accomplishments:
--She now has 4 teeth with three more pushing through.(teething sucks!)
--She began crawling after her first day of daycare. She is a great crawler, very fast and determined.
--She is now on table food. She likes: peas, green beans, carrots, potatoes(mashed or fried), sweet potatoes, pasta, chicken, pork, turkey, cheese(string cheese), peaches, pears, Gerber Veggie Puffs, Gerber Banana Cookies, Cheerios, hot dogs, and rolls.
She doesn't like: grapes
--She turned 1 year old on Nov 8.
--We moved her out of the baby bath tub into the real bath tub. She loves taking a bath! She isn't afraid of water at all. In fact, this week she has started putting her face under the water. Maybe she'll be an Olympic swimmer!
--Our family took a trip to Nashville the week before Christmas. So, Ally got to experience a hotel outside of China. She loves hanging out with her cousins!
--She has been talking so much. Here are some of her words: Dada, Mama, Pappaw, Mammaw, Nana, Kitty, bottle, tree, dog-dog, cold, school, no(she says this one A LOT!!) boo, hi, hello, bye-bye, big, coo-coo(cookie), ish(fish), go-go, pwease(please), mo(more)..She also signs please and more.
The biggest change for me is my returning to work. I love teaching, but I have lost some of my passion for it. I now have a passion for being a mom and spending time with my Ally. I guess this is a normal progression, but it has surprised me. Before Ally, I spent so much time creating lesson plans, grading papers, agonizing over discipline issues etc. Now, I get done what I can by 4:30 and then I pick up Ally from daycare. What doesn't get done at school doesn't get done. Sure, I still grade the occasional paper at home, but it's not like I used to be.
Ally has changed so much!! Here are a few of her accomplishments:
--She now has 4 teeth with three more pushing through.(teething sucks!)
--She began crawling after her first day of daycare. She is a great crawler, very fast and determined.
--She is now on table food. She likes: peas, green beans, carrots, potatoes(mashed or fried), sweet potatoes, pasta, chicken, pork, turkey, cheese(string cheese), peaches, pears, Gerber Veggie Puffs, Gerber Banana Cookies, Cheerios, hot dogs, and rolls.
She doesn't like: grapes
--She turned 1 year old on Nov 8.
--We moved her out of the baby bath tub into the real bath tub. She loves taking a bath! She isn't afraid of water at all. In fact, this week she has started putting her face under the water. Maybe she'll be an Olympic swimmer!
--Our family took a trip to Nashville the week before Christmas. So, Ally got to experience a hotel outside of China. She loves hanging out with her cousins!
--She has been talking so much. Here are some of her words: Dada, Mama, Pappaw, Mammaw, Nana, Kitty, bottle, tree, dog-dog, cold, school, no(she says this one A LOT!!) boo, hi, hello, bye-bye, big, coo-coo(cookie), ish(fish), go-go, pwease(please), mo(more)..She also signs please and more.
--She can point to her head, mouth, nose, belly, and toes when I ask her Where is.....?
--She was baptized on Dec 10.
--She had her first ear infection. So, we had our first non-well baby doctor visit.
--We turned her carseat to face forward....it's a whole new world for her now!
--We have switched from infant formula to toddler formula. In a month or so I plan on transitioning her to milk.
--She can(with some assistance) feed herself with a spoon.
--We've begun brushing her teeth. This is a work in progress. She'll let us put the toothbrush in her mouth and brush a few times and then she's done.
--And, just this week she began to take some unassisted steps. She can walk about 4 steps before she plops on the ground to crawl. Yeah for our big girl!
I still have moments when I look at Ally and think, "Is this real? It's truly unbelievable at times that Ryan and I are parents. Ally is perfect for us. I don't know how the CCAA decides which baby to assign to each family, but they couldn't have placed a more perfect little girl with us.
Being a first time mom is scary. I don't know what I'm doing really. I'm flying by the seat of my pants. I just take it day by day. I'm learning a lot and becoming more comfortable with things. Sometimes I wonder if Ally thinks Ryan and I are crazy! We are, to an extent a little crazy, but we are so clueless sometimes. Ally rolls with the punches though!
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Exploding Heart
It's been six weeks since Allyson Marie was placed in my arms. What I remember from that day is an overwhelming, complex sense of peace that filled my soul. The night before I had been SO SCARED and nervous and truly doubtful. But, when the moment came, there was nothing but great feelings surrounding me. When I look at pictures from that day, July 11, it's almost as if I don't recognize myself. I look so happy and content with life. The 4 and 1/2 year long wait for our daughter took a huge toll on me, but that day changed all those feelings into true love and happiness.
Over the past 4 and 1/2 years I did a massive amount of research about attachment. I wondered if Ally would attach to Ryan and me as her parents, but I also wondered if I would attach to her. What if I didn't attach to Ally like a mother would to her daughter? It happens, this scenario, the scenario of two overly excited adults who have waited for such a long time for their child only to suffer through many painful months where it seems as if they're just a babysitter to this stranger of a child. I said a lot of prayers begging and pleading with God to please let me love my daughter upon first sight.
I felt a lot of things when I met Ally. I felt an overwhelming love for this child who was scared and confused. I felt obligated to provide a great life for her. I felt a great deal of gratitude to finally have a child. I felt a great sense of worry for health and well-being. Yes, I attached to her and she to me, perfectly, it seemed.
But, something happened this week...my heart exploded for my child. All of a sudden when I wasn't with her, my heart ached. When she was asleep I anxiously awaited a cry from her signaling she needed me to soothe her. When she smiled at me, tears came to my eyes. These weren't sad tears, but pure happy tears. I was suddenly so proud of this child who seems like the bravest person I've ever met.
So, I understand now, when someone says motherhood changes you. Of course, motherhood changes your life's schedule and routines, this goes without saying. But, now I know how it is to love something more than you even knew was possible. I love Ally so much it hurts.
My prayers it seems were answered. Thank you, God.
Friday, July 30, 2010
Gotcha Day.....Revisted
We arrived in China on Saturday July 10 at 11:30 pm. We had been on flights for over 20 hours. We were exhausted. Our travel guide, Li Ping met us at baggage claim at the Nanchang Airport. His first words to us, "You get your daughter tomorrow." Wow, tomorrow was only 30 min away. We became very overwhelmed. We had thought we'd have at least a day to recover from jet lag and get mentally focused on being parents. So, needless to say I (melanie) had a wee bit of a mental breakdown once we arrived at the hotel. I was nervous, anxious, scared, and super tired. Whitney(my sister) helped me through it. Thank God she was there.
The Orphanage workers arrive with the babies. (Can you pick out which baby is Ally?)
A moment 4 1/2 years in the making..........Ryan and I being handed over our daughter, Yue Meidong a.k.a. Allyson Marie Fenton
The only tears we had from her, she had to be so scared.
I'm checking out my girl, she's checking us out too.
Ally meets her Pappaw for the first time
On our way back to the hotel
All cleaned up and ready for dinner
Our first family photo, in the restaurant at the Jiangxi Hotel
The next day, after waking up and trying the hotel's breakfast buffet and then going to the grocery store next door to get some formula and diapers, we loaded a van to travel to our daughter.
I'll let the pictures do the talking...................................
This is where we met Ally, the 27th floor of a building.
The Orphanage workers arrive with the babies. (Can you pick out which baby is Ally?)
A moment 4 1/2 years in the making..........Ryan and I being handed over our daughter, Yue Meidong a.k.a. Allyson Marie Fenton
The only tears we had from her, she had to be so scared.
I'm checking out my girl, she's checking us out too.
Ally meets her Pappaw for the first time
On our way back to the hotel
Ally Skyping her Nana for the first time
All cleaned up and ready for dinner
Our first family photo, in the restaurant at the Jiangxi Hotel
Thursday, July 29, 2010
The Orphanage Visit
I apologize for the entry being underneath the pictures. Also, the pictures aren't in the order I'd like them to be in. Bear with me, it seems I've forgotten how to blog!
The baby beds in Ally's room.
The nanny's mother rocking a baby to sleep while holding another baby.
An emotional picture of all of us
The view outside Ally's room
A chair the babies sit in, kind of like a baby walker. This chair caused the scars on Ally's legs.
The nanny holding Ally and Chloe for the first time since they were adopted
The bed in Ally's room, we assume the nanny, her mom, and son all sleep on this bed
A baby in Ally's room. This type of basket is where all the infants sleep
The medical room in the orphanage
The Yugan County SWI(orphanage)
A picture with the orphanage director
This picture was taken at the location Ally was abandoned. It is at the orphanage gates.
Ally's nanny saying good-bye to her for the last time.
The baby beds in Ally's room.
The nanny's mother rocking a baby to sleep while holding another baby.
An emotional picture of all of us
The view outside Ally's room
A chair the babies sit in, kind of like a baby walker. This chair caused the scars on Ally's legs.
The nanny holding Ally and Chloe for the first time since they were adopted
The bed in Ally's room, we assume the nanny, her mom, and son all sleep on this bed
A baby in Ally's room. This type of basket is where all the infants sleep
The medical room in the orphanage
The Yugan County SWI(orphanage)
A picture with the orphanage director
This picture was taken at the location Ally was abandoned. It is at the orphanage gates.
This is an excerpt from an entry I posted on my other blog.
On Thursday we traveled to Ally's orphanage, the Yugan County Social Welfare Institute. The drive was treacherous. Some roads were paved, some were gravel, some were mud. There were water buffalo randomly placed along the sides of the roads throughout our journey. when I think of Ancient China I think of Rice Paddies and people with traditional straw hats on. On the way to Yugan Co, we saw just this scene. It really was beautiful. We also saw a lot of poverty.
When we got into the city two orphanage officials met us and took our van to the various children's finding places. One child was found in an alley by the town's hospital, another by the gates of the old orphanage. Our Ally was found by the gates of the current orphanage. THe orphanage has babies, children of all ages and then it also houses senior citizens. When we arrived at the orphanage we were taken to a conference room where a table was covered in fresh fruit for us to eat. It was a gorgeous spread, however none of us ate anything other than bananas because they were the only fruit we could peel. We handed over our donations to the orphanage director. Many of the workers had come to the room to see the babies. They all knew which baby was which. Ally was referred to as "Dong Dong".
After we met in the conference room we were taken to the babies' rooms. This orphanage has rooms where a nanny lives with the babies. It's like the nanny's apartment. Ally was in Room 3. Her nanny, the nanny's mom and son all live in this one room apartment with, currently, 2 infants and a toddler. The room was small, about the size of my classroom. It had the nanny's full size bed, some shelves, a few baby beds, two wicker baskets which the infants were sleeping in, a small bathroom. There was a small balcony attached to the room. There was also a TV.
The nanny reached out to hold Ally and Chloe(another baby in our travel group who also lived in the same room). She walked over to the balcony windows and cried. She loved our babies. Many people upon discovering we're adotping from China have made comments about us saving the baby and rescuing the poor baby from the desperate situation. Let me get on my soap box and say that I in no way believe Ryan and I rescued Ally from a horrible situation. By America's standards, yes, the living situation was very simple. But, I know that above all else, a child needs love. There is no doubt in my mind that Ally was loved SO MUCH in the 8 months before we met her. Her nanny cried with the tears of a true grieving mother. In my mind ally has 3 mothers: her birth mother, her nanny, and me. I cannot imagine the heartache the nanny went through last Sunday when she said good-bye to Yue Mei Dong, a baby she had cared for for so long. I cry just thinking about it. I hugged the nanny and cried right along with her. I cannot thank her enough for taking such good care of my baby.
Ally, in all honesty, rescued me. In the 6 days she has been with us, this child has taught me about the deepest love I've ever felt. I never knew how much I could love a person. It's as if Ally has been in my heart forever. I sound so cliche right now, I'm sure, but, it's true. And, without her nanny, none of this would have been possible. So, Ryan and I will ensure that Ally knows all about her life before she came to us.
The orphanage visit the most profound moment I've had in my life so far. I can't do it justice here in this blog.
On Thursday we traveled to Ally's orphanage, the Yugan County Social Welfare Institute. The drive was treacherous. Some roads were paved, some were gravel, some were mud. There were water buffalo randomly placed along the sides of the roads throughout our journey. when I think of Ancient China I think of Rice Paddies and people with traditional straw hats on. On the way to Yugan Co, we saw just this scene. It really was beautiful. We also saw a lot of poverty.
When we got into the city two orphanage officials met us and took our van to the various children's finding places. One child was found in an alley by the town's hospital, another by the gates of the old orphanage. Our Ally was found by the gates of the current orphanage. THe orphanage has babies, children of all ages and then it also houses senior citizens. When we arrived at the orphanage we were taken to a conference room where a table was covered in fresh fruit for us to eat. It was a gorgeous spread, however none of us ate anything other than bananas because they were the only fruit we could peel. We handed over our donations to the orphanage director. Many of the workers had come to the room to see the babies. They all knew which baby was which. Ally was referred to as "Dong Dong".
After we met in the conference room we were taken to the babies' rooms. This orphanage has rooms where a nanny lives with the babies. It's like the nanny's apartment. Ally was in Room 3. Her nanny, the nanny's mom and son all live in this one room apartment with, currently, 2 infants and a toddler. The room was small, about the size of my classroom. It had the nanny's full size bed, some shelves, a few baby beds, two wicker baskets which the infants were sleeping in, a small bathroom. There was a small balcony attached to the room. There was also a TV.
The nanny reached out to hold Ally and Chloe(another baby in our travel group who also lived in the same room). She walked over to the balcony windows and cried. She loved our babies. Many people upon discovering we're adotping from China have made comments about us saving the baby and rescuing the poor baby from the desperate situation. Let me get on my soap box and say that I in no way believe Ryan and I rescued Ally from a horrible situation. By America's standards, yes, the living situation was very simple. But, I know that above all else, a child needs love. There is no doubt in my mind that Ally was loved SO MUCH in the 8 months before we met her. Her nanny cried with the tears of a true grieving mother. In my mind ally has 3 mothers: her birth mother, her nanny, and me. I cannot imagine the heartache the nanny went through last Sunday when she said good-bye to Yue Mei Dong, a baby she had cared for for so long. I cry just thinking about it. I hugged the nanny and cried right along with her. I cannot thank her enough for taking such good care of my baby.
Ally, in all honesty, rescued me. In the 6 days she has been with us, this child has taught me about the deepest love I've ever felt. I never knew how much I could love a person. It's as if Ally has been in my heart forever. I sound so cliche right now, I'm sure, but, it's true. And, without her nanny, none of this would have been possible. So, Ryan and I will ensure that Ally knows all about her life before she came to us.
The orphanage visit the most profound moment I've had in my life so far. I can't do it justice here in this blog.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Presenting some pictures.......finally
Picture Decriptions:
1)Red Couch Picture....All the children on the couch are in our travel group. THey are all West Sands babies, West Sands is our agency.
2)This is our Nanchang travel group. We were with these people for the whole China trip.
3)Ryan and I really became close with one of our fellow travel families, Maria, Todd, and their newly-adopted daughter Sarah. They live in South Carolina. They made our trip fantastic. Becoming first-time parents with them, was unbelievably wonderful. We plan on staying in contact with them for many years to come.
4)This is Ally in the arms of Li Ping, our travel guide. Li Ping has made China adoptions his life's work. He is a true advocate for all the China babies. He was a truly amazing man, funny, super well-organized and he "knew the ropes" as our other guide reminded us. We will miss him terribly.
5)Here is ally all dressed up in her Chinese dress and pretty new silver shoes for her red couch photo.
6)I LOVE this picture. This outfit was given to me by Kayla for Ally shortly after we recieved our referral. kayla was one of my Spanish students. She graduated in 2006 and now attends the University of Louisville studying nursing and currently has a 4.o GPA. Can you tell I'm proud of her? Ally is going to adore her!
1)Red Couch Picture....All the children on the couch are in our travel group. THey are all West Sands babies, West Sands is our agency.
2)This is our Nanchang travel group. We were with these people for the whole China trip.
3)Ryan and I really became close with one of our fellow travel families, Maria, Todd, and their newly-adopted daughter Sarah. They live in South Carolina. They made our trip fantastic. Becoming first-time parents with them, was unbelievably wonderful. We plan on staying in contact with them for many years to come.
4)This is Ally in the arms of Li Ping, our travel guide. Li Ping has made China adoptions his life's work. He is a true advocate for all the China babies. He was a truly amazing man, funny, super well-organized and he "knew the ropes" as our other guide reminded us. We will miss him terribly.
5)Here is ally all dressed up in her Chinese dress and pretty new silver shoes for her red couch photo.
6)I LOVE this picture. This outfit was given to me by Kayla for Ally shortly after we recieved our referral. kayla was one of my Spanish students. She graduated in 2006 and now attends the University of Louisville studying nursing and currently has a 4.o GPA. Can you tell I'm proud of her? Ally is going to adore her!
Sunday, July 25, 2010
We are home!
We are finally home from our 2 weeks China adventure. (Unfortunately I couldn't access this blog in China, so I will begin the process of posting a multitude of pictures on here for everyone to see).
Ally did so well on our flight from Shanghai to Detroit. The flight the night beofre from Guangzhou to Shanghai was HORRIBLE. Ally cried the enitre time. We couldn't get her calmed down at all. It didn't help that we were delayed 3 hours and the plane was not air conditioned. It was bad. So, I was dreading the 15 hour flight to the USA. Luckily Ally was a happy baby. She only cried once and that was because she was hungry. She was a favorite of all the flight attendants. They came back to check on her and us often. (We had the BEST flight attendant ever. Her name was Debra. She found us three seats together by my sister. She brought us hot water for Ally's bottles and then even cleaned the bottles for us. She was amazing!) Ally has this new habit of screaming in joy and kind of grunting happily. She did this on the flight a lot. I'm sure she woke people up. She slept a lot of the flight and drank regular bottles and had some baby food. We couldn't had asked for anything better.
She is beginning to learn her new home. She loves her Bumbo seat! She sits in it and plays with her stacking cups and other new toys that were here waiting for her. She slept in her play pen last night and took naps in it today. Tonight I put her in her crib. She loves watching her mobile. Ryan had to take his mom back home tonight(she spent the night with us last night so we could slep in today. Thank God!) So i had a 4 hour span when it was just me and Ally. We played and talked, but as soon as I left the room she would cry loudly. As soon as I would come back in the room she would smile and laugh. This could be a bad sign of how it'll be once Ryan goes back to work.
The cats are HAPPY to see us. They don't really know what to think of Ally yet. When she squeals or cries Lucky meows. Max let her grab his tail. Hopefully they'll attach to her as much as she has attached to us.
This weeks tasks:
1)Schedule a well-visit with Dr. Besson so he can look Ally over.
2)Switch from Chinese formula to the Similac our Doctor gave us.
3)Buy a baby monitor and a baby bath tub.
I almost forgot.......when we got home last night our house had been decorated for our arrival. Our friends had made a gorgeous welcome banner. And, some band students had strewn streamers everywhere and had chalked our car windows and from bay window and front door. It was cute. We took pictures before it rains and washes it all away.
Ally did so well on our flight from Shanghai to Detroit. The flight the night beofre from Guangzhou to Shanghai was HORRIBLE. Ally cried the enitre time. We couldn't get her calmed down at all. It didn't help that we were delayed 3 hours and the plane was not air conditioned. It was bad. So, I was dreading the 15 hour flight to the USA. Luckily Ally was a happy baby. She only cried once and that was because she was hungry. She was a favorite of all the flight attendants. They came back to check on her and us often. (We had the BEST flight attendant ever. Her name was Debra. She found us three seats together by my sister. She brought us hot water for Ally's bottles and then even cleaned the bottles for us. She was amazing!) Ally has this new habit of screaming in joy and kind of grunting happily. She did this on the flight a lot. I'm sure she woke people up. She slept a lot of the flight and drank regular bottles and had some baby food. We couldn't had asked for anything better.
She is beginning to learn her new home. She loves her Bumbo seat! She sits in it and plays with her stacking cups and other new toys that were here waiting for her. She slept in her play pen last night and took naps in it today. Tonight I put her in her crib. She loves watching her mobile. Ryan had to take his mom back home tonight(she spent the night with us last night so we could slep in today. Thank God!) So i had a 4 hour span when it was just me and Ally. We played and talked, but as soon as I left the room she would cry loudly. As soon as I would come back in the room she would smile and laugh. This could be a bad sign of how it'll be once Ryan goes back to work.
The cats are HAPPY to see us. They don't really know what to think of Ally yet. When she squeals or cries Lucky meows. Max let her grab his tail. Hopefully they'll attach to her as much as she has attached to us.
This weeks tasks:
1)Schedule a well-visit with Dr. Besson so he can look Ally over.
2)Switch from Chinese formula to the Similac our Doctor gave us.
3)Buy a baby monitor and a baby bath tub.
I almost forgot.......when we got home last night our house had been decorated for our arrival. Our friends had made a gorgeous welcome banner. And, some band students had strewn streamers everywhere and had chalked our car windows and from bay window and front door. It was cute. We took pictures before it rains and washes it all away.
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