Gotcha Day Anniversary

One year ago today Ryan and I met our Allyson Marie. The night before had been full of jet-lag, overwhelming fear, anxiety, some tears(on my part) and some doubts. But, the moment I held Ally for the first time I had no fears. A sense of pure happiness and peace came over me. I'm serious. It sounds cliche, but that's really what happened to me. I look back at videos and I look so happy.

The past month Ally seems to have become such a toddler. My baby is growing up and it saddens me. Ally has gotten so many teeth the past few weeks. She has also weaned herself off bottles. I miss holding her and feeding her a night time bottle. She's now talking in short sentences. I love listening to her talk. Her voice is so angelic. She has also been sleeping through the night. She still stirs in her sleep and screams out, but she doesn't really wake up or need to be rocked back to sleep anymore.

It's been a year already!

Ally and I Mother's Day 2011
Ally playing in Jacob's sand table.

Ally and her Aunt Whitney

Ally playing peekaboo. This is her new game. She goes in her room, closes the door, and then knocks until one of us come and open the door.

Playing at the daycare's playground. Look at that big mouth!

Happy Baby!

Ally hunting eggs at her first Easter egg hunt.

Ally in her Easter dress on Easter morning.

One year ago today at approximately 4:00 pm my cell phone rang and it was Emily, our agency's China Coordinator. After waiting 6 days from when the first referral rumors came out, we finally got our "call". After over 4 years of waiting I actually wasn't prepared for the call. I was at colorguard try-outs in the band room and I had left in my classroom my list of referral questions to ask Emily. So I asked her if I could call her back in 5 minutes. But, before I let her hang up I asked if we were referred a girl or a boy. I will never forget her words, "You have a girl and she just turned 6 months old." With that news I ran to my classroom to call Emily and get all of our baby's information. Of course, you know the rest of the story....Yue Meidong born on 11-8-09 would meet us, her parents on 7-13-10 and officially become Allyson Marie Fenton, our beautiful and perfect daughter.

With the recent passing of my very first Mother's Day I thought I would list all the things(big and small) I absolutely LOVE about being Ally's mom.

.......I love coming in to Ally's bedroom when she's just woken up from a nap and she is standing up in her crib, her little head barely comes above the crib's railing and when she sees me walk in the room she smiles so big.

.......I love hearing her talk. Her voice is so angelic and innocent. I especially love when she jabbers to herself. She gets so animated!

......I love watching her learn new words. Her vocabulary is extensive for an 18 month old. Of course, I'm a wee bit biased, but I think she is was above average in her vocabulary development.

......I love seeing her figure out how things work, like turning on a light, buckling her seat belt, turning a door know, turning on a water faucet. She's a quick learner, which at times, can be a bad thing!

......I love her sweet little toes! Oh, my gosh, I just want to chew them up they are so precious. And, don't even get me started about how she curls those toes up and wiggles them around.

......I love her little butt cheeks. Nothing is as funny as a naked toddler running around the house. Seeing those little butt cheeks running away from me, I can't help but laugh. And, her butt cheeks are very little, like so little 18 month pants fall straight off her. Baby ain't got back!

.....I love seeing Ally dance. Anytime there is music playing, on the radio or TV, all I have to do is say "Dance baby" and she starts shaking her body, swaying back and forth, and waving her arms in the air. Unfortunately for her, she is like her Mommy and Daddy and has no rhythm.

....I love how Ally has become so accustomed to the lay-out of my school. She can find my classroom, her daycare, the copy room, the door leading to the parking lot, and where Debbie's(one of her Cynthiana aunts)is. She walks these halls like she owns the place!

.....I love witnessing her creating relationships with her grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. I especially enjoy seeing her get close to Whitney, my sister. I know how much fun being an aunt is, so I know Whitney enjoys it too.

.....I love being called Mommy. I could listen to Ally call me Mommy all day long. It truly is music to my ears.

......I love walking into the daycare to pick Ally up and when she sees me she smiles and yells "Mommy" and runs to me.

.....And, I love when Ally gives me kisses and hugs. When she hugs people she says, "aah". It's so funny. Of course, most of her kisses are very slobbery, but I still love them!

Being a mommy is super hard. The worry about Ally's health and happiness is overwhelming. And I have to admit, I miss those times in my past when I could just go lay in bed and take a nap if I felt like it. But, motherhood is honestly, the most fun and rewarding thing I've ever done with my life. Before Ally, I had no purpose and at many times, no hope. But, now, my life is full of purpose and oh boy I have the most hope-filled life I could ever imagine.

Thank you Dear God!

Five years ago, April 18, 2006 our dossier was logged in to the Chinese adoption computers(so to speak). The past five years have passed so very fast, but also so very slow. While waiting for the four+ years for our referral time just ticked away at a snail's pace, but since we received that infamous phone call, man, life has passed FAST!

We have surpassed a special date.....March 11. On this day Ally had spent more time with us than she spent in the orphanage. Luckily, Ryan and I have traumatized her too much. She seems to be thriving and actually loves us a BUNCH! She is growing so fast. She has made it to the American Growth Charts in all areas. The best is her head circumference, she is in the 99th percentile! Yes, my girl has a huge head!

Ally continues to grow her vocabulary, she has well over 60 words that she can say in context. It seems lik everyday she surprises me with another word, today while in the copy room at school she kept on pointing to the copier's key pad and saying "push", she wanted to push the buttons. She's amazingly smart. Sometimes she scares me with how smart she really is. I get visions of her taking Calculus in high school and me not being able to help her AT ALL with her homework.

She can walk and run like a pro. She can maneuver up and down stairs with no problem(while holding someone's hand). Tonight she climbed up onto one of our recliners. She can climb off our bed on her stomach just fine. She's like a little monkey.

She's an eating pro. She'll eat anything once. Her favorite school lunch item are beets. Seriously, the child loves beets. I don't even know how to go about cooking a beet, but Ally loves them so I guess I'll have to learn. She loves Mexican food. When we go to a Mexican restaurant she can throw down some chicken tacos and chips! She also loves spaghetti. She can't feed herself with a spoon yet, it's definitely a skill we need to work with her to develop. She's also still drinking Toddler Formula. I tried to transition her to regular milk, but she didn't care for it so I didn't push it. She's getting plenty of nutrients with the formula. She's also found a juice she likes.....Tang. I didn't even know it existed anymore, but my sister had some and Ally gulped some down and asked for more.

I think the best thing, for me, has seen Ally become an integral part of our extended family. She LOVE her cousins. When she gets to play with the cousins she's at her happiest. She hasn't quite learned how to share, but we're working on it She idolizes Abby. She is obsessed with Abby. She loves to watch videos of Abby and talk to Abby on the phone. She even says Abby's name in her sleep.

Life is good. I still look in Ally's eyes and wonder how I became so lucky to have such a joyous gift in my life. Hearing her yell, "mommy" is true music to my ears.

Ally reading with her Pappaw. Ally drawing with her Nana.

Ally goofing off with her cosins.

Ally playing in her tent......the best $10 I've spent in awhile.

Ally learning some colorguard moves. In Harrison Co. we start the kids off early!

This is my FAVORITE picture of Ally. It represents her spirit perfectly!

Ally reading with Abby.

Ally's first haircut.

Typical Afternoon Fun for Ally

Lately in the Fenton house we have entered a new era.......the "Will Ally ever fall asleep easily again anytime soon?" era. We had a great routine going....pick Ally up from daycare, go home and have a snack, play for a few hours, maybe take a 30 min nap, Daddy gets home and then we play some more, dinnertime, bathtime, play some more, nighttime bottle feeding where Ally falls to sleep(around 9 pm) and her parents get a few hours to themselves before they go to bed.

For the past month Ally has set a new routine..........once she finishes her nighttime bottle she's ready to PARTY. Sometimes she finally goes to sleep as late as 11:00 pm. This new routine is brutal on Ryan and me. So, we've had to set up a new routine for our nights. A big part of this routine includes me trying to tire out my beautiful daughter with as much physical activity as possible. Normally after I pick up Ally from daycare we go straight home. This week I started picking her up from daycare(which is located in the same building where I teach) and having Ally walk ALL OVER the place. Enjoy some pictures of our afternoon adventures.

Ally checking out the parking lot. She likes to watch the busses and once they're gone, she likes to kiss the glass. She'll give the glass a kiss and then turn back to me and laugh.

Ally standing on a desk in my classroom to turn on the lights. A few months ago she learned how to turn light switches on and off. So, everytime we enter or exit a room, Ally's job is to take care of the lights. She takes her job very seriously.

Ally walking around my classroom with her face looking up at the ceiling. (I have pinatas hanging from the ceiling). She reaches up and says, "Pease", meaning "Please hold me up so I can smack at your pinatas."

Ally walking up and down the aisles in my classroom. (Tangent: For so many years I've dreamed about hagning out with my daughter in my classroom after school and now I get to do this everyday. A dream come true. In a few years I'll put her to work helping me grade papers!)

Ally trying to open up a copier's paper drawer. (Notice Uncle Mike in the background.)

Ally walking the halls some more. She LOVES to run away from me. She cackles with laughter everytime!

Ally coming to visit her Aunt Debbie in the computer room.

Ally saying, "Mommy, please give your camera. I've had enough of your picture taking for one day!"

Ally running away from me. She likes to walk out of Debbie's classroom and go next door to the Art room. There's a LOT of stuff for her to gaze at in there!

Aunt Debbie letting Ally help her update the school's webpage.

On a side note......5 years ago Ryan and I were in the USCIS office in Lousville getting our very first set of fingerprints made when we met a couple, Michelle and Kevin and their adopted daughter Lillian. Michelle and Kevin were also getting fingerprints made. They were in the process of adopting a second daughter from China and coincidentally they were using the same agency were were. They told us about their first adoption experience and gave us some advice. It was so nice to meet them! They ended up Logging In with China at the end of May(we Logged in April 18). Well, 8 months ago we received our referral for Ally. Yesterday Michelle, Kevin, and Lillian got to see the first pictures of their new family member, Rose. I'm SO Happy for them. She's absoultely stunning and has the most precious lips and chubby cheeks. We'll be keeping them in our prayers that the next few weeks pass by quickly so they can travel to China and get their girl!

6 months ago....

Six months ago Ryan and I walked into a government office in Nanchang, China. There on the 26th floor we nervously waited to meet our daughter. When I held her for the first time, I've never felt such peace and calm.

We are a match made in Heaven!

Our Happy and Busy life.

The entry is below these pictures. I'm having trouble moving the entry above the pictures. I don't know what I'm doing wrong

This is a family picture taken at Christmas Mass.

I don't know if Ally is smiling or whining here.

Ally smiling for the camera on her 1st birthday, Nov 8, 2010.

Ally taking a ride in her new car that she got from us for her birthday.

Ally with her Mammaw at her 1st Thanksgiving.

Ally waiting patiently for her bath.

Ally walking with her new walking toy.

Ally being animated and entertaining.

Opening up gifts on her first Christmas.

Ally's Baptism Dec 10, 2010

Wow, a lot has happened since my last post.

The biggest change for me is my returning to work. I love teaching, but I have lost some of my passion for it. I now have a passion for being a mom and spending time with my Ally. I guess this is a normal progression, but it has surprised me. Before Ally, I spent so much time creating lesson plans, grading papers, agonizing over discipline issues etc. Now, I get done what I can by 4:30 and then I pick up Ally from daycare. What doesn't get done at school doesn't get done. Sure, I still grade the occasional paper at home, but it's not like I used to be.

Ally has changed so much!! Here are a few of her accomplishments:
--She now has 4 teeth with three more pushing through.(teething sucks!)
--She began crawling after her first day of daycare. She is a great crawler, very fast and determined.
--She is now on table food. She likes: peas, green beans, carrots, potatoes(mashed or fried), sweet potatoes, pasta, chicken, pork, turkey, cheese(string cheese), peaches, pears, Gerber Veggie Puffs, Gerber Banana Cookies, Cheerios, hot dogs, and rolls.
She doesn't like: grapes
--She turned 1 year old on Nov 8.
--We moved her out of the baby bath tub into the real bath tub. She loves taking a bath! She isn't afraid of water at all. In fact, this week she has started putting her face under the water. Maybe she'll be an Olympic swimmer!
--Our family took a trip to Nashville the week before Christmas. So, Ally got to experience a hotel outside of China. She loves hanging out with her cousins!
--She has been talking so much. Here are some of her words: Dada, Mama, Pappaw, Mammaw, Nana, Kitty, bottle, tree, dog-dog, cold, school, no(she says this one A LOT!!) boo, hi, hello, bye-bye, big, coo-coo(cookie), ish(fish), go-go, pwease(please), mo(more)..She also signs please and more.

--She can point to her head, mouth, nose, belly, and toes when I ask her Where is.....?

--She was baptized on Dec 10.

--She had her first ear infection. So, we had our first non-well baby doctor visit.

--We turned her carseat to face forward....it's a whole new world for her now!

--We have switched from infant formula to toddler formula. In a month or so I plan on transitioning her to milk.

--She can(with some assistance) feed herself with a spoon.

--We've begun brushing her teeth. This is a work in progress. She'll let us put the toothbrush in her mouth and brush a few times and then she's done.

--And, just this week she began to take some unassisted steps. She can walk about 4 steps before she plops on the ground to crawl. Yeah for our big girl!

I still have moments when I look at Ally and think, "Is this real? It's truly unbelievable at times that Ryan and I are parents. Ally is perfect for us. I don't know how the CCAA decides which baby to assign to each family, but they couldn't have placed a more perfect little girl with us.

Being a first time mom is scary. I don't know what I'm doing really. I'm flying by the seat of my pants. I just take it day by day. I'm learning a lot and becoming more comfortable with things. Sometimes I wonder if Ally thinks Ryan and I are crazy! We are, to an extent a little crazy, but we are so clueless sometimes. Ally rolls with the punches though!

Exploding Heart

It's been six weeks since Allyson Marie was placed in my arms. What I remember from that day is an overwhelming, complex sense of peace that filled my soul. The night before I had been SO SCARED and nervous and truly doubtful. But, when the moment came, there was nothing but great feelings surrounding me. When I look at pictures from that day, July 11, it's almost as if I don't recognize myself. I look so happy and content with life. The 4 and 1/2 year long wait for our daughter took a huge toll on me, but that day changed all those feelings into true love and happiness.

Over the past 4 and 1/2 years I did a massive amount of research about attachment. I wondered if Ally would attach to Ryan and me as her parents, but I also wondered if I would attach to her. What if I didn't attach to Ally like a mother would to her daughter? It happens, this scenario, the scenario of two overly excited adults who have waited for such a long time for their child only to suffer through many painful months where it seems as if they're just a babysitter to this stranger of a child. I said a lot of prayers begging and pleading with God to please let me love my daughter upon first sight.

I felt a lot of things when I met Ally. I felt an overwhelming love for this child who was scared and confused. I felt obligated to provide a great life for her. I felt a great deal of gratitude to finally have a child. I felt a great sense of worry for health and well-being. Yes, I attached to her and she to me, perfectly, it seemed.

But, something happened this week...my heart exploded for my child. All of a sudden when I wasn't with her, my heart ached. When she was asleep I anxiously awaited a cry from her signaling she needed me to soothe her. When she smiled at me, tears came to my eyes. These weren't sad tears, but pure happy tears. I was suddenly so proud of this child who seems like the bravest person I've ever met.

So, I understand now, when someone says motherhood changes you. Of course, motherhood changes your life's schedule and routines, this goes without saying. But, now I know how it is to love something more than you even knew was possible. I love Ally so much it hurts.

My prayers it seems were answered. Thank you, God.